Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Series 2000 #17 the Werewolf in the Living Room



Series 2000 17 the Werewolf in the Living Room

Front Tagline: Home sweet horror

By now, all regular readers of the site should be old hands at tackling a Goosebumps book involving werewolves. So I have no qualms about issuing a pop quiz. Clear your desks!

the Werewolf in the Living Room Pop Quiz

01 The book employs what unusual (for Goosebumps at least) literary device?
A. Use of highly theoretical fourth-person narration
B. Non-chronological sentences
C. Division of the text into two parts
D. Entire story is told in MadLib fashion, with someone at Scholastic having already filled in the title's "(Monster Everyone Is Tired Of)" slot

02 Despite being about werewolves, the book does stray from Goosebumps convention by making Aaron, its protagonist,
A. Gay
B. Really gay
C. Eleven years old
D. Really eleven years old

03 Aaron's dad has a strange dual occupation. What are his jobs?
A. Ghost buster and Caddy shacker
B. Fairy flosser and Dental hygienist
C. Werewolf hunter and Town sheriff
D. Executive in charge of keeping peanut butter out of chocolate and Executive in charge of keeping chocolate out of peanut butter

04 In search of the creatures, Aaron's dad drags his son to the made-up European country of
A. LilSmoki
B. Kielbasah
C. Bratvia
D. Hotdogonabun

05 Within like five pages, the protagonist both has a dream sequence and
A. Has another dream sequence about the first dream sequence and it's all like whoa, so deep
B. Wakes up with his pillow missing
C. Gets bitten by a werewolf
D. Dreams he got bitten by a pillow and wakes up to find his werewolf missing

06 The werewolf comes back to visit Aaron and gives him
A. A written apology
B. A punchcard good for one free sub after his tenth werewolf attack
C. A wolf-tooth necklace
D. What for, the rite bastid

07 Ever the canon-changer, RL Stine presents yet more new ways to stop a werewolf in this, his eighteenth book about werewolves. Which of the following new methods actually appears in the novel?
A. Slapping the werewolf in the forehead three times
B. Saying the werewolf's name
C. Both A and B
D. Not D

08 Aaron visits with a hag in the forest who kicks him out of her cabin after she sees his
A. Boy Scout merit badge for cabin-disrupting
B. Eyes measuring the distance between her and the oven
C. Wolf-tooth necklace
D. Xeroxed list of herbal websites

09 Aaron's dad catches what he believes to be a werewolf. The only problem is that the werewolf has taken the form of
A. Golden-Age Werewolf
B. Wendell Willkie
C. A small, mild-mannered bald man named Ben
D. Two werewolves

10 Aaron's dad kidnaps the man, who insists he is not a werewolf, and ships him back to America in a crate. He also gives the werewolf what annoying moniker?
A. There Wolf
B. Werey
C. Wolfie
D. Ben, Werewolf-Style

11 While sailing to America, Ben breaks free from his chains just in time to
A. Avoid paying membership dues to the Being-Held-In-Chains Organization of Greater Bratvia
B. Make it to the post office before they close
C. Save Aaron from drowning
D. Have the refrain of "Chain of Fools" play over his actions in the movie trailer, complete with the sound of a needle being pulled from the record when the werewolf poorly attempts to dance in a fashionable manner

12 Aaron's dad keeps Ben locked in a cage in his living room, despite the fact that Ben insists
A. The room he's being held in is technically the den
B. He's pretty sure it's still considered kidnapping even if you think the person you're kidnapping is a mythical creature
C. He's not a werewolf
D. His predicament would make for a lousy book title

13 Aaron's best friend Ashlee takes her fashion cues from what popular Goosebumps character?
A. Evan from Monster Blood
B. Monster Blood from Monster Blood
C. Andy from Monster Blood
D. Monster Blood from Monster Blood III

14 Ashlee comes to see the caged man in Aaron's living room and
A. Tells a joke-- Q: What kind of milk does Ben drink? A: Werewolf Skim
B. Makes Ben an escape cake with a vampire baked inside
C. Takes pity on Ben, giving him a candy bar to eat
D. Advises him not to say or transform into anything until his legal counsel arrives

15 Feeling sure his dad has made a mistake about Ben, Aaron does what?
A. Writes to his congressman about passing the Aaron's Dad Is Like Totally Wrong Bill
B. Offers to hold magical body-switching stone at the same time as Ben
C. Takes pity on Ben, giving him a candy bar to eat
D. Offers to describe the outside world in "very vivid detail" if Ben agrees to stay incarcerated

16 Aaron does ultimately let Ben loose, only to realize his mistake when
A. Ben says "Oh by the way, I'm a werewolf" on his way out the door
B. Ben says "Oh by the way, I'm not a werewolf-- PSYCH!" on his way out the door
C. Ben turns into a werewolf and maims three people immediately following his release
D. Ben writes him a letter and signs it as "Ben the Werewolf," with "the Werewolf" scribbled over a few times

17 Aaron soon realizes that the werewolf terrorizing the town is actually
A. Ben. What a twist!
B. An overly-intricate PETA protest
C. Himself
D. One of the fifty other werewolves from these books

18 Aaron feels nauseated once he realizes that during his werewolf rampage, he ate
A. At Applebee's
B. Nine. Oh no, he's not a werewolf, he's a Seven!
C. Ashlee's French poodle
D. Off his friend's plate even though he said he wasn't hungry and didn't order anything

19 Aaron's dad almost kills his werewolf son. What stops him?
A. Killing children still illegal in all fifty states
B. Guiltily realizes "Aren't we all a little bit werewolfish at times?"
C. Notices the werewolf's wolf-tooth necklace
D. The sudden realization that there's no such job as "Werewolf hunter"

20 Aaron saves Werewolf Ben from being shot, only to discover that Aaron's dad
A. Forgot to put bullets in his weapon. The werewolf then easily ducks the unloaded gun after Aaron's dad throws it at his head
B. Is an undercover werewolf who is in too deep to blow his cover
C. Is willing to turn both werewolves over to the proper science authorities, which I guess is something which exists in this book
D. Doesn't really care about werewolves anymore. He's more into Transformers now. And dinosaurs. Dinosaurs are neat!

EXTRA CREDIT What is Aaron's solution to all of his problems?
A. Wait them out. The book ends on the next page, what could possibly happen at the last moment to completely alter the circumstances of the previous 115 pages?
B. Cut a bitch
C. Bite his dad, forming a Werewolf Trio
D. Bite nineteen other people, forming a Werewolf Orchestra


the Platonic Boy-Girl Relationship:
Aaron and his best pal Ashlee, who appears halfway through the novel.

Questionable Parenting:
I sure hope Aaron's dad never tries to lecture his son about not kidnapping people, because he's certainly blown his ability to pass judgment on that.

Memorable Cliffhanger Chapter Ending:
Ch. 6/7:
Aaron's dad screams out for his son to hurry outside and... eat some eggs! I hope you enjoyed that, as it was the most thrilling part of the book.

Great Prose Alert:
I ate my best friend's dog!

Conclusions:
Does a werewolf hunter count as a scientist?

75 comments:

Groggy Dundee said...

Jesus H. Christ that sounds awful. Good thing I skipped this one as a kid.

troy steele said...

Here's an open call to anyone reading this: Do any of you remember those little pocket-sized books about werewolves and vampires and other mythical creatures that the Scholastic Book Company used to sell through their school ordering system (the tissue paper thin catalogs, whatever that system was called)? They had all these crazy made-up facts and they were the size of those horoscope books at grocery store registers. I would love to know what that series was called so I can try and get them off eBay.

Anonymous said...

Amazing. This sounds really terrible. I think I did read this one but apparently my mind has blocked all of it out.

There... haven't actually been all that many books about werewolves though, have there?

And every children's book about a monster has to completely alter the facts about that monster. That's why they're classics, right?

Brodie said...

Troy, I think I had the zombie one. It was green, and had a black and white photo on the front cover yeah?

I think I still have it. I can try and send it to you. It's expensive to send to America, though, probably.

troy steele said...

That's it exactly. Thanks for the kind offer, but no need for you to part with it-- if you could just tell me (either here or via email) the full title, author, and the name of the series (if the series even had a title), that would be super helpful for me to track 'em down on my own

Anonymous said...

Considering that the werewolf-centric Goosebumps stories seem to be getting exponentially worse, don't be surprised if when the next one rolls around it implodes before you can finish due to the pure level of suck involved.

Also, do they REALLY always have to have the same stupid twist? Jeez.

Anonymous said...

I hate the multiple choice entries solely because I never know the actual answer...

Martin said...

Whoa! Troy, I know exactly what you're talking about. The books are called "Shock Shots" and there are a series of 6 of them:

1. Ghosts (Black cover)
2. Zombies (Green)
3. Monsters (Brown)
4. Vampires (Red)
5. Werewolves (Blue)
6. Mummies (Brown)

I used to love them as a kid, hope you can find them!

Martin said...

Oh whoops, forgot the authors:

For Ghosts, Vampire, Werewolves and Mummies - Dona Smith

For Zombies - Nancy E. Krulik

For Monsters - Chip Lovitt

Zak said...

So does Aaron actually bite his dad in the end? And IS Ben really a werewolf? I forget...

troy steele said...

Yes on both counts. Werewolf Aaron also acts like a dog and curls up on the floor while his father rubs his stomach

Nihil Novum said...

On the multiple choice entries, I think the answer is always C.

troy steele said...

It's pretty damning for the series when it's hard to tell the joke answers from the real ones

Oh, and thanks Martin!

Anonymous said...

"D. Not D"

AHAHAHAHAHA

Groggy Dundee said...

>Considering that the werewolf-centric Goosebumps stories seem to be getting exponentially worse, don't be surprised if when the next one rolls around it implodes before you can finish due to the pure level of suck involved.

Although not a werewolf story per se, Full Moon Fever is werewolf-ish, and it's basically a novel-length version of that Pumpkin Juice story from a few weeks ago. I expect Troy will despise that one.

Next week is Horrors of the Black Ring. I do remember liking that, although it has some needless gross-out moments in it. It's one of the shorter books at least, I think 108 pages.

Anonymous said...

Does he puke out the poodle? If not, this is, what, the second book in the series which doesn't mention puking (on the part of the characters, not the reader)?

jarred said...

werewolf hunters could b e called crypto-zoologists and yes they are scientists

Zak said...

I remember just a couple weeks ago (I think in Jekyll and Heidi) Troy said that there's no way they'd ever have any dog-eating... haha

tj said...

Any vomit in this one?
Or Jekyell and hedi? Or Scream School? Or The Mummy walks?

Anonymous said...

This probably isn't the only case of this happening but he has the same name as the boy in Jekyll and Heidi - is he the same boy or does R.L.Stine have no imagination when it comes to names?

gargatar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
gargatar said...

Stine said something once about how his editor gets mad because he always names all of his protagonists "Chuck", I think it was in It Came from Ohio. Therefore, lack of imagination seems to be the likely answer.

MARZ said...

This is the most amazing blog ever.

- Mila

Anonymous said...

I'm unsure if Stine's gotten better at naming originality. Revenge Of The Living Dummy has a character called "Molly Molloy," and an Amazon synopsis for Welcome To Camp Slither names the protagonists as Joey and Zoey. But that's a sort of inverted example, as a different Amazon listing calls them Boone and Heather...

Anon e Mouse Jr. said...

Anonymous said:

"an Amazon synopsis for Welcome To Camp Slither names the protagonists as Joey and Zoey. But that's a sort of inverted example, as a different Amazon listing calls them Boone and Heather..."

That's "Joel and Zoey", not "Joey and Zoey". And it's for the audiobook edition. The regular book has the "Boone and Heather" names in its description.

Until next time...

Anon e Mouse Jr.

Groggy Dundee said...

Don't worry guys, there's a nice vomit scene in this week's book...

Anonymous said...

My mistake; should have checked it. Still, though, what's going on there? It'd be quite amusing if the audiobook department were accidentally sent only a draft of WtCS, resulting in entirely different audio and book versions.

So I've been wondering. Is it definitely Horrors Of The Black Ring tomorrow? I'm not sure I can face it, and was wondering when we'd see the first Triple Header.

Groggy Dundee said...

That one would be good, and I'm curious why Troy did the second triple header before that one.

Groggy Dundee said...

Update tonight?

troy steele said...

Sure

scar said...

Can't wait

Zak said...

Horrors of the Black Ring, that's another one I'm gonna ask for the last line to.

troy steele said...

"It even has a face inside!" she cried. "Isn't that cool?"

Groggy Dundee said...

How long was that one Troy? 108 pages right?

troy steele said...

Exactly

Groggy Dundee said...

That's got to put HotBR in the running for the shortest Goosebumps book ever, I think.

Zak said...

Cheers Troy

Anonymous said...

The horrors of the Black Ring proving a little too horrible, I wonder, Troy?

tj said...

Where's the update

Anonymous said...

That's less "omg where's the update" posts than I expected. I was visualising a wall of comments, each imagining that they had asked the question which everyone else was strangely silent on.

Anyway. A lack of Goosebumps for a while will be boring, but we'll pull through. Have a good break, Troy.

And here was me remembering HotBR as a gross-out.

Groggy Dundee said...

Don't worry about it dude. We'll grumble and shake our fists, but we'll be here when we get back.

tj said...

fuck you troy
if your gonna be too lazy to post the update then quit the blog

Ryan Ferneau said...

But this will be a THREE-week break for us.

Mike said...

for god's sake tj let the guy have a break

Q & T said...

Troy, you have to fight through. R.L. Stine wants you to fail. YOU HAVE TO FIGHT HIM. YOU MUST FIGHT AND. YOU. WILL. WIN!

troy steele said...

I lied, I'm really not updating to punish you all for letting Pushing Daisies get canceled. I hope this gives you all time to think about what you've done

Anonymous said...

marry me troy i'll show you my other mole

-r.l. stine

tj said...

Happy Thanksgiving Troy!~

Dr said...

Damn you Troy. Horrors of the Black Ring was my favorite GB2000 book (with Earth Geeks Must Go at a distant second). I've been waiting for this one since before you even started reviewing the 2000 series, and then when the day finally arrives you use a three week break.

Nihil Novum said...

I took a month's hiatus on my Animorphs blog after Arrested Development got canceled, so I understand.resor

Groggy Dundee said...

I just re-read this book over the weekend, actually. It's loads of fun, and aside from the gratuitous gross-out moments it's probably the best Series 2000 book. It's certainly got the snarky sense of humor that a lot of the better Goosebumps books (Be Careful What You Wish For, for instance) have.

Groggy Dundee said...

I should clarify, my last comment is on Horrors of the Black Ring, not Werewolf in the Living Room.

Smarty Pants on Fire said...

For anyone interested, two new Goosebumps DVDs have been announced...

The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight which also includes "Don't Go to Sleep" and "Calling All Creeps"

and

Return of the Mummy which also includes "Don't Wake Mummy" and "You Can't Scare Me"

Release date is March 31, 2009...my birthday!

I'm glad they're finally starting to take this DVD business seriously. Now if they could just re-release some of the older titles with decent new cover art and more than one episode...

Anon e Mouse Jr. said...

Actually, twelve of the older DVDs were combined into five four-episode sets and one five-episode set, and released on the same day as the newest three. Still had the old cover art, but hey, it's progress. The list is on the Goosebumps TV Series page on Wikipedia. (I'm the one who added that information, by the way.)

Until next time...

Anon e Mouse Jr.

Anonymous said...

Torrents, baby. ;)

Anonymous said...

Those Goosebumps DVDs are ridiculously expensive, especially considering the quality of what little content you're getting. Why don't they at least group the episodes in themed box-sets, like the company that released the Unsolved Mysteries DVDs? Ridiculous.

-Red Medicine

Groggy Dundee said...

I just read My Friends Call Me Monster tonight. It was pretty awful, IF it was supposed to be serious. I have to think Stine was just taking the piss though. Here's a sample line, make your own decision:
"I always try to think positively. Even when I'm DOOMED!"

Anonymous said...

Stine taking the mick was my judgement of Dr. Maniac Vs. Robby Schwartz, for that matter. I swear he knew exactly what he was doing in that book.

Groggy Dundee said...

It's possible he's letting the perceptive audience know this whole series is a joke. Although I thought the Scream of the Haunted Mask was actually good by Goosebumps standards. I mean, a whole book of "Great Prose Alert"-worthy writing?

Groggy Dundee said...

>"Molly Molloy"

Maybe Stine just likes His Girl Friday.

Smarty Pants on Fire said...

Jeez Anon E Mouse, thanks for stealing my thunder.

Anyway, the DVDs aren't very expensive. The latest 3 (with the new box covers) each include 4 episodes each, and I found them at Wal Mart for ten bucks each.
At $2.50 an episode, that's hardly expensive.
Jes' saying...if I can spend $5.99 each for these terrible Horrorland books, I'm more than willing to spend $10 for two hours of actual decent Goosebumps material.

Zak said...

Three more days!!

And no, Earth Geeks was by far the best GB2000 book. It should have ended on that, dammit! He could have released Ghost in the Mirror first... Earth Geeks Must Go was more silly and about humor than scary you'd think that it was something he was planning to end with. Seriously has ANYONE here besides me read that one?

Anonymous said...

I read EGMG!. I think that even when I was a kid I didn't exactly find it riveting.

On that note, is it still going to be Horrors Of The Black Ring this week, Troy, or will you delve into something else?

Groggy Dundee said...

It had better be.

Groggy Dundee said...

Zak: Yeah, Earth Geeks Must Go sucked hardcore. I don't think Stine was trying with that one, and even if he was intending to be funny, it was still noxious.

Anonymous said...

whens the update

Anonymous said...

So hopefully, after such a long wait, we'll actually see the update up on Tuesday? And not the wee hours of Wednesday morning/Wednesday afternoon/an istockphoto days later?

Pleaseeeeee?

Brodie said...

Man, I love when people feel Troy *owes* them an update. It's up when it's up. He owes you nothing.

Anonymous said...

Think of it as hearty appreciation. In disguise.

Groggy Dundee said...

I read Who's Your Mummy? tonight at Barnes and Noble. Not only is it dire, it features CANNIBALISM. I hope I don't have to say anything more than that.

Anonymous said...

Oh man, can't wait.

Anonymous said...

Can anyone tell me the answers to all of the questions?

Craig said...

Shame you didn't do a proper review for this one, I actually think this is the best GB2000 book by far, and the cover is awesome.

Anonymous said...

Reading this blog makes me want to write a Goosebumps book just to show R.L. Stine what a new storyline and believable characters look like.

captaintwinings said...

I ate my best friend's dog!

Not all of it.